Cleaning out my closet!

AYoooooooooooooo….. you might’ve been thinking ML is dead.. They ain’t gonna update no more..HELL NO. As diddy would say WE STILL HERE!!! Now don’t think for a minute that anything has slipped, my ears have been perked up *no homo*, taking notes and we gonna recap a whole month worth of shit fuck it, its time to pay my dues… Here we go……………

Fuck the kids, I just hope he ain’t hurt Bubbles none.

A huge motivating factor in doing this huge update was I couldn’t wait much longer to speak my piece on Jacko being free on all counts,(If you need to click that link, stop living under a rock). Now the theory I was leaning towards was MJ was being played for some dough, and that fam isn’t smart cause dude is debt (but $300 mil isn’t nothing!) and is hanging on to the Beatles catalog for dear life. What I wanted to happen was for him to get some jail time so those Jackson crazies who camped out on the star wars fan-tip could moonwalk into some nice cali riots. A perfect example of their craziness is this clip of Triumph the insult comic dog camped out with all the crazies oh well. If I was Mike what I would do is hit the streets with… “Jesus Juice” take over the market from pimp, crunk and even apple juices. What a great look that would be.. sipping on some Jesus juice on my way to church (Jim Jones what up!). I know it would outsell Master P’s King of energy.

Joey is happy his mom bought the new clothes not himself

Over at the ship the Hova is steering (can you steer a ship?) Joe Budden is the first rapper in recent memory that I remember that is desperate to have his album pushed back… according to him def jam is committing murder by “”N—as at Def Jam is pushing n—as off the diving board,””… If your shit is hot its hot I don’t see what he is so worried about, he says Memphis Bleek and Young Gunz were rushed..and I think they just made shitty music and Jay-Z said it himself Bleek can be 1 hit away all his life and still be millionaire. For Budden’s debut They didn’t rush him and I pretty sure pushed him back last time and promoted the hell out of him and he still flopped, why? Because the album wasn’t that great (Not too bad tho IMO). Stop crying.

“I told Ronald McDonald in 95
Don’t let them mess with da red fro…that thing is hot”
Nuff said.. check “Ate At McDonalds”-60 Cent Featuring Lame

Do you know where you can see this woman? Ozzfest duh!

On some older shit…Jada Pinkett Smith (Will’s wife, u fools) is touring on, Ozzfest??? I have a simple question, which Osbourne was sniffing the white devil when they made this call? I hope they have Lil Romeo and papa on that shit soon.

um… *NO HOMO*

Before being knocked the hell out of the playoffs Shaq announced he wants to pretty much be an undercover police officer. This can be taken with full seriousness because he can blend in so well with the general public and no one would know because no one reads the news!

That a nice pair. of glasses that he is wearing, pearlvision I bet!

In other association news Phil Jackson is back, now even Stevie Wonder could see this will be a disaster. But hey I would come back for a boat load of money and be able to continue tappin the owner’s daughter.

oh yea the finals.. call me crazy but Pistons in 7.

In the latest Chappelle news he has been hollering at the executive folk at comedy central as of late, that’s some good news hopeful shit comes back this year. To get a small fix of Chappelle i highly you somehow get your hands on the copy of the premiere episode of this seasons Russell Simmons’ Def Poetry Jam…he reads two hilarious poems one entitled “Fuck Ashton Kutcher”, I wont ruin it for y’all by just pasting the text. Speaking of Chappelle, Mike Epps was recently asked about Chappelle and dude comes off as a hater like none other after saying some nonsense, Black actors dammit!

Tony Yayo also had a diss that went out to d-block…that shit was depressing just imagine a fake Jamaican impression on alcohol/x/coke rambling some random sentences and that’s the diss because I’m looking out for yo ears I wont even link the audio.

Note: this is far as I got before my computer went to shit twice so, 5 days late here we continue bitches!

Hey..robots can malfunction too
The first thing on my Mind is.. FUCKING Big Shot Bob Aka Robert Horry…what does dude take? While the spurs may have went up 3-2, Im standing by my prediction. He is quickly becoming the #1 clutch player since Reggie was giving Knickerbocker fans heart attacks.

Dude chillin in the cut
Meanwhile today I was watching the news and I had to double check what I was listening to..that bonkers Pope blessed not kids, not men, not women but some 45 Ferraris. What kind of bonkers shit is that? Why isn’t he visiting some sick kids or some shit.. how can you say you want to respect the tradition of the church but have this kind of things going down? I hope he blesses 45 boxes of some ipods or somethin’ next.

Pink Floyd is reuniting for live 8, the 50 year old man in all of you should be excited!

While I might not have posted in a bit.. don’t think the dc area didn’t put its gutter activities on hold we had some homie rolling off in a scooter from a robbery. If that isn’t your flavor you can always take a shot well at getting stabbed (shot and stab in the same sentence, violence alert!!) at a department store, but I don’t see no word on if blood got on any Nordstroms coupons. If you are going between the two states are in actual DC don’t forget to stop by and jam some parking meters.

I was going to post on Mike Tyson about to murdergut an Irish man like a fish in the ring but ummm… yea. But speaking of the Irish bum who ever promotes him.. NEVER LET HIM TOUCH A MICROPHONE ever again, my ears thank you.

the most gangster beauty school ever.
Something I wish happened in DC happened in Louisiana…Dude went into some beauty school to stick em up.. he left in a ambulance after being hit the fuck up by 30 women with curling irons and table legs, my highlight is..

“Oh, I put something on him, baby,” school instructor Dianne Mitchell said. “He wasn’t coming up out of here and telling nobody he robbed us and got away with it.”

If you missed these.. some good readings on Common here and here

He matches! nhjic
Another rapper I like the work of Jin apparenlty retired from rapping to pursue acting (because he was amazing in the 20sec on camera role in 2 fast 2 furious!!!) The funny thing is this news broke from his myspace. He’ll be back before the end of the year because he’ll realize the industry doesn’t treat everybody right.

Snoop and WEED?!?!?!?
Snoop has a commerical up in the zee Netherlands, his dutch speaking is on point!

How does compton ass terry from viva la bam know that compton hoods aren’t really big fans (or maybe in some sick way they are)? He got shot twice.

In the first reported case of someone actually using ‘pastor’ Mase for guidance, DMX gives Mase credit for giving him ‘advice’ to rap again. Dude couldnt even stay retired for 2 years, are you listening Jay-Z?? I wonder if Mase also advised X’s on how to cook crack.
Also it sounds like DMX might be housing Illegal immigrants

“I have some property in Arizona,” he said. “I love the vibe, the desert, but it’s still a night life, still a ‘hood [out there]. It keeps me grounded.”

So much for peace campaigns… remember when The Game and 50 put on that act that they kissed and made up.. I know I smelled bullshit. The Game isn’t happy at all and in the month of June has made it known first as the month kicked off with the announcement of his G-Unot campaign and the beat down of a costume rat who was supposed to represent 50 at HOT97′s summer jam. Then he went on to record a diss thats only 15 fucking minutes!! He name drops everyone from Samantha Ronson to Nas and disses everyone from Banks to Olivia. Its definitely worth a listen. There is gonna be some beef cooking during the summer. I wonder if new G-unit members M.O.P. and Mobb Deep will get involved? And to improve the G-Unot campaign was no joke check out this hillarious video of G-Unot protectors right across and in front of Tony Yayo’s posse while he made a radio appearance.

Xzibit here is shown holding the most street cred mic you can think of.
Since Xzibit has become the white ad executive’s sweetheart he signed a 2 year deal to endorse Dada shoes, I am sure that all the 3 people who wear Dada (Including CWebb) are excited.

Track of the first 1/2 of the year, Kanye West Ft. Jay-Z-Diamonds

Some other hot tracks since we last spoke..
P. Diddy ft. Black Rob G. Dep-Godfather Good… Diddy gets Rob and the Deputy out from homeless shelters for this *cough* hot track.

R Kelly and his 5 part story telling song Trapped in the closet.. some fucked up shit. (LOL @ Chuck)

New XXL cover, Lebron is on the Roc (If he is, hopefully not anywhere near a mic)?

Those french fans are hardcore.

Wow does Mariah Carey get some sketch ass fan mail. I guess Glitter couldn’t even drive them away.

Noel Gallagher of Oasis intervie
him on hip-hop:

NG: I fucking despise hip hop. Loathe it. Eminem is a fucking idiot and I find 50 Cent the most distasteful character I have ever crossed in my life. It’s so negative. Eminem’s new song about his kid – isn’t it the most ridiculous piece of music you have ever heard in your life? I just don’t like the dragging women around on dog leads and all that stuff. I’m not fucking having that.

DW: I don’t really get it either. I suppose it’s a fantasy that some people have…

NG: I’m not saying they’re directly responsible but that’s how you end up with these fuckin’ gangs of youths with hoods stabbing people. I’m not saying they need to sit around listening to ‘All You Need is Love’. But kids are so fuckin’ thick these days that they are very easily influenced, aren’t they?

Also here is a quick Wu-tang wrap up for the month…
*Ghost Interview Part 1, and Part 2.
*RZA Launches Wu-Tang Latino.. You know how much I love Wu but I think that crazy spanish shit should be left to Nore.
*RZA doesn’t disappoint with this news, he is doing another part to the Manual. If you haven’t read the 1st one yet.. WTF ARE YOU WAITING FOR? all the kids are doing it!
*Rae, GZA, Ghost all have solo albums on the way… Cant wait for all 3.
*a real grimy photoshoot with Rae.

Tom Cruise got squired on in England during his movie premiere *no homo*. (With Video)

The po-po gets down real funky!

Rappers and child support are like bread and butter..and the king of Child Support is Diddy who was ordered to pay 250k (yes that’s with zero) a month for his son.

THIS IS HOT!! (then you are prolly a necrophiliac)

Watch this is, esp. if you haven’t seen Pulp fiction.

Hopefully, Me in 10 years.

One half of Reflection Eternal, Hi-Tek interview…very good read.


Soccer thugs cry too. keep your head up ManU.

If you haven’t checked out the premiere episode of Russell Simmons Def Poetry Jam…I highly suggest you do, cause you might spot some comedian that was recently in south Africa.

Like my man Buffalo mentioned Cassidy’s situation….the free Cassidy t-shirts are going to print soon! Speaking of buffalo.. 3rd cleanest city in the US, word up!

ADD style update, Cop that SEAN PRICE-MONKEY BARZ and peep the hillarious interview and we out

P.S. Fuck you kanye for pushing your shit back to august.


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