Yesterday, the upcoming media outlet known as Time dropped their ‘100 Most Influential People in the World‘. No one really in hip hop said much about Time’s list omitting rappers. It’s true they didn’t have many musicians on the list, and entertainment in general. Other influential people in the world picked the likes of Rihanna, Louis CK, Jose Andres, etc. No one picked a single rapper. In my eyes the likes of Jay-Z, Kanye, even Drake are more influential than the aforementioned. What does this all mean, are rappers not influential or did Time just reach out to a bunch of people that didn’t find rappers to be influential (I mean, why didn’t the secretary of Education, Arne Duncan pick Lil B?? HE JUST LECTURED AT NYU). I’m guessing it’s the latter. What does influential even mean? Tyler the Creator can probably organize a riot of teenagers before you can say “Time”, isn’t that influential?
Sidebar: how ironic that Jeremy Lin picked Tim Tebow?
Ronald William Artest, Jr. is no more. As you may have heard by now, the man, the legend, the former malcontent who has worn a half dozen numbers, has now OFFICIALLY changed his name to Metta World Peace. Do you realize what this means?!? We may never see the nickname “Tru Warrier” shaved into the cranium of this QB baller.
This puts Art—err…Peace on the short list of athletes with absolutely redonkulous name changes. The other two being a certain Chad Javon Ochocino, currently of the New England Patriots, and World B. Free. World, née Lloyd was born in Atlanta and grew up in Canarsie. He had a pretty solid pro career. He’s also got some sick moves. I love these names. I, I I I love it. And I thank you, Mr. Free. Mr. Artest would also like to tell you that his d— thanks you.
Peace will still have a hard time escaping his troubled past. How could we forget about his Henny sippin’ ways in the locker room? But people make mistakes; some are just funnier than others, and involve George Lopez. It looks like Peace is here to stay. I’d say we have as good a chance of seeing him change his name back as we do at having an NBA season this year. Oh by the way, you can check out Peace on Dancing with the Stars this Monday.
D-Stern grew this beard during the 1998-99 NBA lockout
In case you’ve been living under a rock this summer, lockouts have been all the rage. After 4 ½ months of lockout chit chat, yada yada yada, the NFL is back. The Eagles and Patriots have been acquiring free agents and malcontents like they’re hotcakes. With the symbolic signing of the new CBA on the steps of the Pro Football Hall of Fame in Canton, the NFL should now be entering its version of the Pax Romana. Phew. At least now we don’t need to worry about a rise in crime.
The NBA is another story. It looks like there ain’t gonna be a season, and it’s a shame because I think a lot of us really wanted to see the Heat lose not one, not two, not three—ah, you know how it goes. And what about seeing the Artist Formerly Known as Ron Artest sporting a No. 15 Lakers jersey with the word PEACE on the back? Maybe he’ll suit up and join former Laker Jordan Farmar in Israel. It was a great season, and the league’s ratings soared in the Finals, but the situation is getting really ugly. If you check out the league’s website, you won’t see a single image of a current player. The NBA is now suing the players. The players are going to file a motion for dismissal in the coming days. Oof. Lawsuits no bueno. Current players aren’t helping their case. Michael Beasley is acting up again, this time at the Dyckman Tournament in Washington Heights. Former players are at it too. Samaki Walker was pulled over recently and tried to eat marijuana. Darius Miles, another NBA burnout, tried to get a loaded gun past airport security. Miles should just stick to cameo appearances in Ryan Reynolds films. So…it looks like there isn’t going to be a 2011-12 NBA season, and that’s just a shame. But hey, at least some of our stars will play somewhere else. I’d personally love to see D-Wade take his talents to China.
The NFL Lockout has been frustrating for all fans. During a time when we should be looking forward to next season, we’ve been bombarded with stories about how Ray Lewis thinks the extended lockout will cause a rise in crime, or how Cowboys owner Jerry Jones had to receive special permission to attend Tony Romo’s wedding. Screw you lockout. What do I have to look forward to on Sunday’s next fall? Season Three of The Good Wife?
Besides being a master of the Samba, Ward also knows how to give props to NFL dancers of old, notably Elbert “Ickey” Woods, a pioneer for the touchdown dance who created the Ickey Shuffle (it starts at about the :56 mark). Ickey was a fullback for the Cincinnatti Bengals in from 1988 to 1991. He scored 15 touchdowns in his rookie season, and helped lead the Bengals to a berth in Super Bowl XXIII where they lost to the San Francisco 49ers, in a game best known for Joe Montana’s leading a 92-yard game winning drive. The league almost banned the dance for the 1989 season. The shuffle even made it into an episode of How I Met Your Mother. It’s a simple dance. First you shuffle to the right with the ball in the right hand, then back to the left, then back to the right, and then you spike the ball. Woods would then twirl his finger in the air. He even shuffled at a charity basketball game in 2009. So bottom line is we need the NFL back. We need the dances, especially the Ickey Shuffle.
Scoops Callahan made an appearance at Phil Jackson’s presser!
If you tuned in to see the Mavericks’ 122-86 shellacking of the Lakers last night that completed the sweep, then you probably witnessed Phil Jackson’s last game. Not the way I’d like to see the Zen Master leave the game, but still, satisfying nonetheless for the non-Lakers fans out there. Don’t be surprised if he comes back. He’s flirted with retirement in years past, only to come back yet again. Remind you of anyone he used to coach back in Chicago? If this was his last game, it was a truly pathetic display. The team lost its cool. Surprisingly enough, Ron Artest was not ejected, but his teammates Lamar Odom and Andrew Bynum made up for it with a 2-for-1 special. To top it all off, Jackson was fined $35,000 for criticizing the refs.
If there was a bright spot surrounding Jackson, it was the appearance of Scoops Callahan at the end of Jackson’s presser. It was a nice comical ending to an embarrassing series for Jackson. “You have to ultimately take a lot of pride in knowing that you and your Cajun career were nothing but the bees knees,” said Callahan, whose real name Tom Griblle. Jackson’s response? “Amen.” Gribble is the producer for Sportsradio 1310’s BAD radio show in Dallas and he does an incredible impression of 1920’s style journalists, with phrases like “Champ! Champ!” and “the cats meow.” Over the years, he has appeared at several other press conferences. How he gets credentials for this shtick is beyond me. Hilarious nonetheless. Check out his bits with Phil Mickelson, Tom Brady, and Bill Belichick.
JD$wag is a freelance writer living in New York and Metal Lungies’ new sports writer. He grew up on the mean streets of the D.C. ‘burbs, and his favorite athlete is Popeye Jones. He’s still mad at that punk Jeffrey Maier for that stunt he pulled against the Orioles in Game 1 of the 1996 ALCS.
Queensbridge’s own Ron Artest isn’t the only Lakers player to have a track under his belt believe it or not. You would think maybe Pau would have a Spanish song akin to Tony Parker’s French pump-up jam “Bienvenue dans le Texas,” which features the likes of Booba. Yes, Booba. Sort of looks like a half-Senegalese Pitbull. (Note, this track is awful, but the echoing dub “Dirty dirty dirty Souf” is quite comical). No Pau, so maybe Lamar Odom would dedicate a slow jam to his bodacious boo Khloe K? I can’t dig anything up. Nope. None of them. Who does that leave? Steve Blake trying to show that he’s the next Yelawolf?
Not so fast. Kobe Bean Bryant, in fact put out a song a few years ago. Giving yet more credence to Kobe’s inflated ego, the song is titled “K.O.B.E,” and it features Tyra Banks. Have a listen. Sort of sounds like Will Smith’s Miami mixed in with a little 3LW, right? Tyra’s chorus is great: “K-O-B-E I L-O-V-E you. I believe you are very fine. If you give me one chance, I promise to love you and be with you forever more.” I wonder how his wife feels about that, especially after well..that little incident in Colorado a few years back. Kobe raps that he lives for “Basketball, beats and broads.” Let’s keep it to the first one, after all, Game Two is tonight.
Pluto’s not even a planet no more, which I’m very disturbed about. I grew up when Pluto was a planet. Now, I’m 25, I turn around and Pluto’s no longer a planet. I’m going to elbow that guy in the nose. I love Pluto. Everybody loves Pluto. There’s a dog named Pluto in the cartoons. I don’t know how we got on that subject. We’ve got to see if we can get Pluto back.
Want to celebrate John Daly’s triumphant return to Golf relevancy (something I know nothing about) rocking zubaz-looking pants at the British Open this week? More importantly enjoy a nice summer beverage? Well let me introduce an original drink creation from the ML bar.
I’ve dominated games defensively, and sometimes people don’t see it. It’s like that Chinese death blow hit. You don’t feel until it’s in you, and five seconds later, you kind of die. I forget the name of it, but it’s a death blow.
The other night, Ron Artest took an unnecessary three when it would have made much more sense to wait down the shot clock. Fans booed, but a moment later, an unfazed Artest charged to the basket and hit a game winning shot at the buzzer. In the post game interview (below), Craig Sager asks as nicely as he can why Artest took the three when the Lakers had a three point lead. During his largely incoherent response, Ron responds with what I hope will become a maxim for our generation: “You gotta play basketball.” Yes Ron, you do play basketball.