Metal Lungies

Ok, Get this. I woke up this morning at 6:00 to go and meet lethal for a Rockcorps volunteer thing for a ticket to see Ricky Ross, and Ghostface. Now we are both students and staying at parents home’s over the summer so when I pulled up at his house I decided to call his cell as to avoid ringing the doorbell and waking the entire family. So I did, and he didn’t pick up. After trying several more calls and waiting for 30 minutes I called a friend to get Lethal’s house number. After waking up, and confusing my friend I drove around the corner (because I’m a coward and would rather piss off his family with a distant phone call than with a direct knock on the door). After several unsucessful phone tries I was fed-up with Lethal’s lack of initiative and decided to get on the train and go down to DC myself to do the volunteer work (mind you, I did call Lethal another 10 times or so during the trip). After a 45 minute train ride I arrived on the outskirts of Northern DC. (Note that throughout my commute I had been frantically looking for other volunteers and had found none.) I got off at the train station and came to find that the directions I had recieved from boost mobile left me at about a 7 mile walk from the station to my destination. This left me with no other option but to walk, a decision that would have made me late (and thus ineligible), and robbed as I had to walk through about six miles of “Rough DC”. Frustrated I decided to cut my losses and head back home. After an hour-long trip I arrived back at my local metro station and went back to my house relaying the sob story to my brother. Then, around 11pm I recieved a phone call from Kathy at boost mobile. Embarassed because of missing the event, I cut off her talking immediately explaining my entire story in detail, at which time she replied to me “i’m very sorry your directions were wrong sir, but the event is tomorrow.”

I was speechless for an hour. I checked the dates so many times I had been building up for so long and I was a day early? Later I recieved a call from lethal which started with him suggesting that I refrain from crack-cocaine use that early in the morning. I explained the whole story and felt it worthy of a post. Hilarious.

Full Concert coverage from Me and Lethal will come following the concert on Sunday….err…..Monday
I need to lay off that pipe………

Late.

I really like the guys jogging outfit..shit I like hers too!

After such a phenomenal response (telepathic of course, see: 0 comments to the post) to the fart in the shoe aisle story, here is another ‘story’.
So being the gadget whore that I am, I’ve been jogging (or “yogging” as my gf calls it because..she um prefers to make her j’s “soft”) more than usual thanks to apple’s nike+ ipod nano thing that tracks your runs and makes pretty graphs and so on, I’m sure even the grandmas at retirement communities have heard about it by now so I’m not going to explain anymore what it is (OR GOOGLE DAMMIT). So the Jog starts off normal as any other, but before I am 30 seconds into it, a car speeding by with someone sticking out of the passenger window that yells “HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO“, (and reacting as if my only interaction are the rats at petsmart) I jump up and get startled mid-stride as the car passed by me (in retrospect I think it might have been a friend of mine driving by (I SWEAR I HAVE THEM, I HAVE PICTURES!!). Anyway I keep jogging and not a few minutes later thanks to all the wonderful forest chopping they are doing in the county I spot not one, not two but THREE deer on the fucking sidewalk. Being afraid they will triple-team me into naughty things I have to run into the road to run around them. OK that should be enough right? Nope. A few minutes later an early 90’s chevy/ford red pickup truck comes to a crawl and a scruffy looking man with a pony tail, yells out to me if I need a ride.. (??? I wasn’t running from the police.) My elementary schools lessons of not to get into strangers cars overcomes my middle-age sketch looking male fetish, and I just ignore the man and keep running (OK I’m not gonna play it completely tough I sped a up a little). Then with all the lumbering that’s going on to build a new road to the interstate comes a construction site and the sidewalk I had to go through a bit later was really thin because there was an ass load of work near there with a lot of crew (even at 9pm!!), and I noticed there was a mid-20s couple walking senior citizen style in a single file, so I had to zig zag through them and almost fall into a ditch to pass them, as I passed them I heard some grumblings and simply waved in apology, they probably thought I was showing them up. So the rest of the way there weren’t much things to note. But when I got home, I dropped my iced strawberry-kiwi (NO Formula 50 in this house!) vitamin water in kitchen spilling all over, so i just proceeded to roll around and soak it up with my sweaty body (OK that’s a lie, I had to use a roll of bounty paper towels to clean that shit up). Oh yeah, my run was only 6 seconds off my average.
So there you have it kids if you like deer, old men in pickup trucks or other shit, please come to Maryland and jog at 9pm on the streets!

out.

So first I got to drop this little story which I think many of you should enjoy.

Your favorite ML homie was shopping for some new shoes the other day at a department store. I was about to go in to this one aisle when a black man pretty much jumped right into my face. His reaction screamed “don’t go there unless you want to get robbed”. I was wrong, a 100% wrong, as what he proceeded to say has probably changed my life. He said very firmly “do not go down there…(4 sec pause, as he collected himself)…that man farted (as he pointed to some white man walking away from the other side of the aisle). I stood in shock & awe and greatfullness of this warning. As the kind warning-giving man marched past me he muttered “Nasty ass motherfucker”, and upon having his taste for new shoes spoiled bolted straight for the exit. I will tell this shit to my childeren. The End.

ok in other shit…

If you want to see the very few chances to see nudity in a CNN news article check this . Look very hard at the top left hand corner, hopefully that is a woman’s goods and not man boobs *shudder/no homo which from now on being the trend whore I am, will simply refer to as ‘nh’* I am so 10 years old.

Thanks to the nice folks at spinemagazine.com, check out the Mission Impossible III theme done by Kanyeezy w/ help for Keyisha Cole, and Twista. I’m kinda on the fence about it but it does have those Kanye drums that gave Twista a mainstream career over 2 years ago (and it also has a Michael Jackson refrence!). Anyone want to play it backwards? It probably has some scientology message they agreed to work in on that “Yvan Eht Nioj” tip (simpsons refrence yo).

and you know NHL & NBA & NFL come first but this shit tells me clearly how sad the CinciNati Reds are

“Signing Hatteberg was the key” to the deal, Krivsky said.

How can 36 year old journeyman be a key to anything? Maybe the ‘key’ to the soda machine in the clubhouse? Sad. I bet current Nats/ Ex-Reds GM Jim Bowden is laughing his ass off.

THE reason to be a DEA federale. Now that is crazy delicious. Those are probably good as a nice lunch snack.

out.

p.s. some sick reviews + interviews coming REAL soon.

So I was browsing the Washington Post aka WP (for the cyber streets) for more signs of how DC/MoCo area keeps it gully. I used to write about this quite a bit, if you don’t recall check the archives. Well anyway, I came across this piece, and I’ve had my share of stories, and these too are pretty good ones.

I might as well tell my story, Some buddies and I were headed down to the Talib/Mos Def/Pharohe Monch show at the 9:30 club. We got on the Red Line at white flint, as soon as we got on. I noticied a guy, dressed some in timbs and baggy clothes, sitting near one of the doors on the car and was fumbling around, going through like all his pockets, looking at what looked like years old papers that were very worn. A few minutes later he caught my attention again. He took out a walie-talkie and start franticly talking it to it saying shit like “Green 43, 34” then “Blue 43 82”, while looking frantically down both sides of the metro car. At first this went on for 10 minutes, I thought there was gonna be some gang or some shit he was calling in. A lot of the folks on the train (mostly your standard over 40, white, dc vistors) were starting to get worried and shook looks. Then he started to dissemble the walkie-talkie yet he still continued to yell out those same codes.. this continued for the whole ride to Gallery-Place/Chinatown, I didn’t want it to end but we had to get off the train, But ever since I’ve always wondered if there was an exciting conclusion to this mans train journey.

out.

Guttah

Tired and worn I return to bring the word!!!! The word is Guttah……allow me to elaborate. I was recently (6 hours ago) in the capitol of hip-hop, NYC. Sticking to my usual plan of gulliness I hit the streets in search of some shit that I could not photograph. After copping about 5 bootlegs I came upon this dude who was regailing passing folk with an invitation into his place of buisness (an unmarked building). I approached him to inquire about some DVDs and he said he had none, at this point a young man tapped on my shoulder to get my attention. He showed me this CD in a plain white sleeve and proceeded to say “Thats me and my brother man”, so I copped it (5 bucks, why not?). I listened to his CD and for an off-the-block artist its pretty nice. So a shoutout to the Guttah Coalition. I give them the Track of the Day.

So it seems that our man Cassidy may be staying inside for a minute. I see this as a plus for him. Being locked up right before your album drops is marketing you just can not buy!!!! Maybe he can get himself a nice prison setup like good old Mr. Zekey. After all, he’s a huslter…….right?

Like you needed another reason to hate Suge Knight, it turns out that he may have had a role in the murder of Biggie. Supposedly Mario Ha’mmond (some snitch he was in prison with) was told by Knight that he had organized the murder over a cellphone network. Also implicated were Death Row security leaders Big Sikes aka Devon Sikes and Reg aka Reggie Wright Jr.. Lets just say that I wouldn’t be suprised if we are reading the obituary of Mr. Ha’mmond sometime later this week.

{This comes the day after an internet crash….thank god for drafts!!!}

Today the BIG trial was postponed because of a new tip that suggests the two implicated LAPD officers (David A. Mack and Rafael Perez) confessed to killing the Notorious One. Usually this inflow of snitching would bother someone like me but the mofos who killed Biggie deserve this shit.

Lloyd banks may also encounter some legal trouble because an alleged rape victim who implicated him quite a while ago has an eyewitness who saw the alleged assault. So if Buck and Banks go to prison (followed shortly by the prison magnet……err Talk of New York Tony Yayo) then will G-Unit be completely consumed by it’s new members.

Aight thats it. Update soon.

Track of the Day: Guttah Coalition feat. Dolaco- This is how it is